Ennui.....
Jul. 8th, 2005 12:14 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
poltr1Another lonely night. I wish I had someone close to talk to. My wife's asleep so I can't talk to her.
Happily ever after? It only happens in fairy tales.
Some nights I'm so lonely it feels that I haven't a friend in the world. I hug my pillow because R is already conked out, and M is between her and I. I mention it to R and she responds, "Everyone gets lonely sometimes."
The happiest I've ever felt is when I'm in the arms of a loved one, and vice versa.
Sarcasm hurts like paper cuts. It's like being patted on the back by someone with a joy buzzer. I don't get the humor; all I get is the hurt. And I'm tired of hurting, and tired of being hurt.
In the meantime, someone's gone and tattooed the words "Kick Me" on my back.
Some days I feel like a stray cat who's been kicked too many times by people. I want lovies and pets (and food), but I'm afraid to approach people lest I be kicked again.
Maybe that's why I isolate myself, and surround myself with inanimate things instead of people.
And a rock feels no pain. And an island never cries.
Happily ever after? It only happens in fairy tales.
Some nights I'm so lonely it feels that I haven't a friend in the world. I hug my pillow because R is already conked out, and M is between her and I. I mention it to R and she responds, "Everyone gets lonely sometimes."
The happiest I've ever felt is when I'm in the arms of a loved one, and vice versa.
Sarcasm hurts like paper cuts. It's like being patted on the back by someone with a joy buzzer. I don't get the humor; all I get is the hurt. And I'm tired of hurting, and tired of being hurt.
In the meantime, someone's gone and tattooed the words "Kick Me" on my back.
Some days I feel like a stray cat who's been kicked too many times by people. I want lovies and pets (and food), but I'm afraid to approach people lest I be kicked again.
Maybe that's why I isolate myself, and surround myself with inanimate things instead of people.
And a rock feels no pain. And an island never cries.
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no subject
Date: 2005-07-08 04:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-07-08 11:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-07-08 05:08 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-07-08 05:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-07-08 06:19 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-07-08 02:55 pm (UTC)Wish I could do more than just cyberhugs:(
no subject
Date: 2005-07-08 04:00 pm (UTC)I wish I knew what to say that would be even somewhat comforting. Doubt this means much, but if you ever have a night like this again, and want to chat, IM me because I am always around late night and such. Be well *hugs again*
P.S. on a totally unrelated note, are you going to the Bis picnic tomorrow?
no subject
Date: 2005-07-08 11:30 pm (UTC)I'm planning on being there. I gotta make some taboule.
no subject
Date: 2005-07-09 03:33 am (UTC)I will be at the picnic as well with a very badly baked lemon blueberry cake thing that didnt bake up correctly. I bet it taste good though :D See you there!
Depression
Date: 2005-07-10 09:49 pm (UTC)If you really feel your spouse doesn't understand you, get in a couple of sessions of marriage counseling. Not because anything is truly wrong, but because you feel there are some things you want to talk about and can't.
Good idea not to wake up your sleeping S/O. Inconsiderat at best and fight material at worst. No one needs another reason to fight.
KG
Re: Depression
Date: 2005-07-11 02:26 am (UTC)